Ever since I left Colorado, I have felt deprived of my educational resources. Life under the Flatirons in Boulder-Colorado had me surrounded by local left-leaning activism to the strongest degree. Boulder had (and still does have) a stable counter-culture; therefore members of right-wing coalitions frequented (and still frequent) the city in the hopes of antagonizing their enemies. This exposure to both argumentative forces allowed me to educate myself under the interpretation of different points of view. Because Boulder-Colorado is a political hotbed, free opinionated publications (usually left-leaning) are readily available to everyone, at no charge, in the hopes of politically proselytizing the reader. The most important educational resource that I sincerely miss since moving away from Colorado is The Onion. I recently acquired one of these top-secret publications, by way of the modern Underground Railroad, and I was astonished by what I found. Marijuana is legal to everyone!!!! Okay…. You have to pretend that you have a medical condition that could vaguely justify the need for you to smoke an ounce a day. From what I hear, you can theoretically go in to the right “doctors” office and complain that you have a headache, because you drank too much alcohol the night before, and you will receive a prescription for the finest Sinsemilla on Earth. When I lived in Colorado and read The Onion, the newspapers were splattered with advertisements promising you the best phone sex that a person could imagine. With free unlimited pornography online and prostitutes readily available on websites such as www.backpage.com the need for phone sex is over. Instead the mind-jarring advertisements that fill the pages of The Onion offer you marijuana and it’s accessories in its finest form.
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AuthorPersuasive Graffiti Archives
October 2017
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